When someone is mad at me or upset with me, it drives me crazy.
Don't worry, we were just acting in this picture, but sometimes those facial expressions are accurate in relationships.
Actually, someone doesn't even have to be mad...it's like if a relationship changes at all I freak out about it. I think that it MUST be something I have done wrong.
I think about every solution possible, what I should do, what I can say, what I should have done differently, and so on and so on.
I have been known to dwell on the question, "Is that person mad at me? Why doesn't he/she talk to me anymore?" for YEARS. Years, people.
And this is not past tense. This is something that drives me crazy presently.
I also feel like I need to see all of my friends somewhat regularly or I'm going to lose them. It's like - Ohmyword. I haven't seen this person in 2.4 weeks. We're growing apart. I need to talk to her. I don't even know what she's been doing this month. We have to get lunch now. WE HAVE TO GET LUNCH BEFORE THIS FALLS APART. I need to call her. She's not answering. I'll text her. She'll NEVER want to get lunch again because I've let too much time pass. I'M A HORRIBLE FRIEND.
That's not much of an exaggeration. It sounds like a middle school girl who is freaking out about a boy she has a crush on. I have a problem.
The Bible gave me a little wake up call last night. As it tends to do since it's God's Word and all. At church we were talking about Romans 12 (AMAZING chapter, go read it) and this verse jumped out at me:
"If possible, so far as it depends on you, live peaceably with all."
God does not condone dwelling on broken relationships forever.
God does not tell us to straight up "live peaceably with all". No.
He says IF POSSIBLE.
He also says SO FAR AS IT DEPENDS ON YOU.
Those two little clauses punched me in the face. Hard.
This implies that sometimes it's just not possible. Sometimes I've done everything I can do in a relationship and I just have to let it go.
And it's OKAY to let go.
It's okay to realize I've done all I can do.
It's okay to drift apart because it's inevitable sometimes.
It's okay to never know why someone doesn't talk to me anymore.
It's okay that the relationship doesn't depend on me anymore.
It's okay to miss a friendship but not dwell on it.
It's okay to make new friends.
I don't have to freak out. Which doesn't mean that I won't anymore, but I just need to remind myself of this and that short but meaningful little verse. I think this also relates to my struggle with wanting approval.
Does anyone else have this problem or one like it?
I'd love to know I'm not the only one!
You know what, I said "it's okay" so many times that I might as well add this to the "It's Ok Thursdays" link-up. :)