Day 3: Respecting Him in How I Talk About Him
This one is probably going to be short and sweet.
I should not speak badly of my husband. To him or to others.
Actually, I shouldn't be speaking badly about anyone, but the point here is to focus on my husband. Belittling him, degrading him, putting him down, undermining him - none of this should be coming out of my mouth. Ever.
Like I said in my first post of this series, if I am in a dangerous situation or one that requires help from others, then I should discuss the issue with highly trusted church leaders or mentors. But even then I can be respectful.
I am representing the gospel in my marriage. That is a serious thing! How can we be a picture of Christ and the church if I am making fun of Jordan or putting him down? How would that glorify God?
It's one thing to have some lighthearted teasing. Jordan and I do that all the time - it's a way we flirt with each other. (Mainly him teasing me, haha.) But I have to be careful of crossing the line and hurting his feelings, especially around other people. I'm definitely guilty of going too far. And he may not show it. That's the thing - a lot of the time guys don't show that they're hurt. They're usually not as quick to show sensitivity as we ladies are. But that doesn't mean it doesn't affect them! I need to check my words and my heart. Think about them before I say them. Ask myself if the words are edifying or if I will be tearing him down.
And I'm not just talking about when I'm around Jordan. This also goes for when I'm with my friends or any group of people. Often I try to disguise bad-mouthing as "venting". That doesn't make it okay.
I think that it's frequently innocent - we try to make a joke but it comes out the wrong way and we end up questioning their manhood. Because we're not thinking. But sometimes I think it's intentional. I see Facebook statuses constantly that consist of wives making fun of their husbands. I know that it totally depends on the person and maybe a lot of husbands don't actually care, BUT should we really be partaking in that anyway? Again, is it a good representation of Christ? That is of course between me, the Lord, and my husband. But it's something to think and pray about.
Speaking of teasing, here's a great shot at our wedding of me being totally embarrassed during my best friend's toast. :)
See you tomorrow for Day 4 - Respecting my Husband: His Work.